Birthdays Suck Sucker
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You know what sucks? Getting older. You know what doesn’t suck? Delicious candy with a taste that makes you feel like a kid again. Now suck on this sucker, which doesn’t suck, to help you suck it up about growing up, which sucks. And if you really want to keep your brain springy and youthful, you can try saying that last sentence five times fast.
This lollipop is tutti-frutti flavored and brightly rainbow colored, just like the candy stores of your youth. Not only does it taste great, it features a sticker on the front to let all your birthday party guests know what you’re all thinking: now that you’re so old you can’t even keep counting the number on lollipops any more, birthdays suck!
Net weight 1.23oz/32g.